Why Am I Reading These Books?

I read a lot of books, and recently beat my record of 42 books in a year. All but one is nonfiction. Part

of those books are books I've read before, and it's an eclectic bunch.

A few I haven't read in five years. Like the personal defense books I bought and read five years back.

With reading, I generally follow the whims of my heart as to what to read next. Or I'm driven relentlessly by curiosity to learn more.

The interesting part is I've used and generally had to use what I learn in the near future.

As a Christian, I believe in the sovereignty of God, and His providential ordering of the universe.

Why am I interested in my defense books again?

Is it because I see them as practical psychology? Mental defense?
Am I keeping the sword sharp...so to speak?

Where will I need this?

Or is it part of the rebalancing I tend to notice within myself. Where I go to one extreme from another and then balance out. Questions. Questions. Yet I continue to read.